A divorce for parents is not one battle; it is two. There is the “Financial Battle,” a fight over money and property. And there is the “Custody Battle,” a fight for time with your children. When you search for the best divorce attorney in Irvine, you are looking for a general to lead you in both. But it is critical to understand that these two battles are not equal. One is a math problem that ends; the other is a human problem that defines your future. This is why a firm like JOS FAMILY LAW places such a strong emphasis on custody.
The Financial Battle is what most people focus on. It is about community property, 401(k)s, spousal support, and the house. In California, the rules are relatively clear. Community property is divided 50/50. Support is often determined by a guideline. This fight is high-stakes and stressful, but it is finite. A good lawyer can get you a fair settlement, and in a few years, your finances will recover. This battle is about what is divisible and replaceable.
The Custody Battle is completely different. It is not a 50/50 math problem. It is governed by the vague, subjective “best interest of the child” standard. The “winnings” are not money; they are irreplaceable time. They are holidays, birthdays, and school nights. And unlike the financial settlement, the custody order never ends. It is a living document you will follow every single day until your children are 18.
This is where the most tragic mistake in a divorce happens: parents, and their lawyers, treat these two battles as if they are the same. They use the children as a bargaining chip in the financial fight. You may hear, “I’ll give you the house, but only if you give me sole custody,” or “Give me more spousal support, and I’ll be more ‘flexible’ on your parenting time.” This is a devastating, short-sighted error. You can always earn more money. You can buy another house. You can never get back your child’s 8th-grade year.
This is why your hiring criteria must change. You are not looking for the best financial lawyer who also does custody. You are looking for the best custody lawyer who also handles the financials. Your attorney’s primary, non-negotiable skill must be their ability to strategize, negotiate, and, if necessary, litigate your parenting plan. Their entire philosophy should be that your time with your children is the one non-negotiable asset that can never be “traded” for anything.
When you interview a lawyer, listen to what they talk about first. Do they jump right to your assets? Or do they ask about your kids, their routines, and your goals as a parent? The answer will tell you everything you need to know about their priorities.
Your priority is what is irreplaceable. Your lawyer’s priority should be the same. To speak with a legal team that puts child custody first, contact the specialists at JOS FAMILY LAW.
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